Dear Ones of St. Columba's,

 Happy New Year! I hope you were able to step into 2019 in the way you wanted, whether it was through celebration or meditation, with cherished friends and family, or in the solace of your own company. Andrew and I cheated the clock a bit, and did a countdown with the kids well before midnight on Monday, and were tucked away and asleep when the new year began. 

This is a time of year when there is a lot of buzz about change, and resolutions, and becoming a whole new you. I'm the sort of person who has never been successful at resolutions. Dramatic change just isn't my jam, and my personal experience has been that when I attempt to make a big turnaround in my life what I usually discover is a new way to fail. It's discouraging, and so a few years back I stopped participating in the whole New Year Resolution thing. (That being said, if it works for you - do it!)

Here is what I do instead: I use the new year as an opportunity to pay closer attention to my life, to listen to what I need, and consider what small or gradual changes I may be called to consider. A couple of years ago, as we headed into an election year, I noticed my anxiety around social media posts was pretty high. So I set an intention to be kind on social media - to others and to myself. That ended up meaning I didn't post very much, or read very many posts, that year. Last year it took a few months of praying, and paying attention for a focus to find me - what emerged was a need to pay attention to my work-life balance, and engage in some gradual changes that would eventually bring things more in line.

As Episcopal Christians, we practice a faith tradition that embraces a gradual conversion of life, as opposed to dramatic and instantaneous change. Our way of following Jesus assumes that we are transformed more and more into the image of Christ because of our daily, weekly, and seasonal spiritual practices such as individual prayer, praying the Daily Office, participating in Eucharist together, and engaging in corporate and individual acts of compassion, as well as the pursuit of learning and using our intellects and minds to shape our experiences of God and each other. This doesn't mean we don't have mountaintop moments, or experience dramatic transformation. It just means we don't have to, in order to turn our hearts and lives ever more toward God. 

So this new year, if you are one for big resolutions, I wish you well. And, I beg you to be kind to yourself. Consider using these first weeks of a new year to pay close attention to your life - what is most fulfilling for you right now? Where are the areas of dissatisfaction, fear, or anxiety? Instead of, or in addition to, a big about face in some part of your life, I wonder if God is calling you to a gradual transformation, a small step that could turn into a whole new journey, if you were to give it the proper time and attention to develop? 

This Sunday we will celebrate the arrival of the Magi, Epiphany Sunday. As their long journey comes to an unexpected end, I pray that each of us begins this year with care, kindness, and the faith that transformation is like a journey following a wild star - it begins with small steps, and may go in directions that no one could have ever seen coming.

with peace, hope, and love,

Alissa